Bob Lytle selected When the Saints Go Marching In along with the U.S. Air Force Song in honor of Memorial Day and in tribute to his father-in-law, a courageous airman who was shot down three times while serving over Europe and North Africa during World War II.

As the club paused to remember those who served and sacrificed, Bob’s musical selections served as a moving reminder that Memorial Day is more than the unofficial start of summer — it is a time to honor the bravery, sacrifice, and enduring legacy of the men and women who defended our nation, often at tremendous personal cost.

Sheriff Peter Stuhlreyer came in hot this week, immediately roasting Jeff Duperon for struggling to pronounce Ani Tinaj’s name. The Sheriff found it absolutely unbelievable that Jeff Duperon, who works in international trade, a Rochester Hills resident, no less, couldn’t manage an Albanian name. Apparently, international diplomacy is not one of Jeff’s gifts.

Sheriff Peter then shifted into quiz-show mode, announcing he had a question “for the smart people in the room.” The question: What war was Memorial Day originally established to commemorate? After several incorrect guesses floated around the room, the Sheriff finally revealed the answer: the Civil War. He then turned to Blake McLellan, clearly the youngest person in attendance, and kindly explained that the Civil War is “not an Avengers movie.”

The Sheriff also shared some important Memorial Day statistics, noting that hamburgers, pulled pork, and potato salad are among the most popular foods consumed during the holiday weekend. Judging by club attendance lately, Peter suspects Rochester Rotary believes Memorial Day has become Memorial Month, and apparently, we are training for it one buffet at a time.

Travel statistics also came under fire. Peter announced that nearly 45 million Americans are expected to travel this weekend and estimated that roughly 20 million of them still have no idea the left lane is for passing. “It’s not about aggression,” he explained. “It’s about pace.”

That naturally led him to the new HOV lane on I-75, where he revealed that Karen Joyce apparently counts Daisy the dog as her passenger in order to qualify. “At least she sits up,” he noted.

Summer blockbuster season wasn’t safe either. Sheriff Peter mentioned the new Michael Jackson biopic / musical drama film Michael and claimed that Paul Haig has already seen it twice. But according to social media rumors, Jo Allen may have topped that by allegedly seeing The Devil Wears Prada 2 four times already! Some people support the arts a little too enthusiastically.

In honor of National Schizophrenic Week — which Peter clarified is entirely different from Sociopath Week — Tim Crawford found himself in the Sheriff’s crosshairs. Tim was reportedly spotted on Mother’s Day washing cars and watering the lawn during the community water crisis, all while smiling like nothing was wrong. Sheriff Peter assessed a $10 fine for violating the water conservation mandate and perhaps another for excessive cheerfulness.

Finally, Peter lamented that Dave Walker was absent, depriving everyone of what was apparently a very good joke. Instead, attention turned to Christine Hage, who failed to complete a dare connected to May 19th and Marilyn Monroe’s famous rendition of “Happy Birthday.” For refusing to perform the song as assigned, Christine was hit with a $10 fine — proving once again that in Rochester Rotary, failure to entertain has consequences.

Thanks to Sheriff Stuhlreyer's creative enforcement, we raised an additional $189  for our scholarship program! Remember, these “fines” are all in good fun and serve a great purpose: building camaraderie and raising funds for our charitable efforts, especially scholarships. Let’s continue living out the Rotary motto, "Service Above Self," with enthusiasm, punctuality, and a healthy dose of Rochester pride and humor!