• Sheriff Peter Stuhlreyer spilled the tea with a big announcement: Vivek Ramaswamy has decided to ditch his gig at the freshly minted Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) to run for Ohio governor—clearly before realizing that Phil Lowman is a card-carrying member of Rochester Rotary. Vivek even offered to perform a free DOGE audit of our Club, but we graciously (and sassily) said, "Hard pass, thanks!"
• Peter wasn't done, though. He dove headfirst into a list of brilliantly absurd money-saving ideas for the Club, each one more ridiculous than the last. First up: cancel all of Mayor Barnett's speaking fees (sorry, Bryan), replace Tom Townsend with AI (because apparently, we can do better), and rebrand Happy Buck to Happy Benjamins—a cool $100 minimum, people. He suggested that Blake McLellan dust off an abacus instead of relying on those fancy electronic ledgers and that the winners of the 15th Handshake not only forfeit their fine-free status but also bus their tables like the rest of us ordinary folk.
• Peter’s pièce de résistance? Relocating our meetings from the Community House to his  Uncle Jim's barn in Metamora—who needs ambiance anyway? Why not charge an entrance fee to Rotary Gateway Park while we're at it? As for the beloved Rotarian of the Week trophy, Peter suggests we appraise it, auction it off, and swap it for a $10-a-week rental of a plain plastic hospital urinal. Classy, right?
• And those $5 birthday fines? Nope, he's proposing a fine equal to your actual age. Turning 70? Hand over the cash, Grandpa. To top it all off, Peter came for our songbooks, claiming their 175 pages of repeated lyrics are a waste of resources. Bold, Sheriff, bold.

Despite all the sass, Peter reminded us that these ridiculous "fines" helped us raise $130 for the scholarship program. Not too shabby for a morning of good-natured roasting!

 

SPEAKER 

JoJo Dries, founder of the nonprofit On the Wings of Angels, is a powerhouse of inspiration. She is an author, speaker, and advocate for change. Her book The Lotus: How I Beat the Patriarchy is a raw and captivating story of her journey out of a toxic home environment.

Through her personal experience, JoJo created On the Wings of Angels to empower individuals across the spectrum who want to escape abusive situations and need guidance, resources, and a supportive community.

JoJo is happily married to her childhood sweetheart, Paul, and together, they've built a beautiful life with their two sons and a lovable rescue dog. But JoJo's journey was far from easy. She shared the heartbreaking reality of growing up in a domestically violent home, where her father sexually abused her from the age of 9 through her mid-20s. In her late 20s, she found the courage to escape and rebuild her life from the ground up. Her nonprofit, On the Wings of Angels, transforms the lives of survivors through:

JoJo also highlighted the signs of domestic violence, urging everyone to stay vigilant when noticing:

Last year alone, On the Wings of Angels provided life-changing support to over 100 individuals—men, women, and children—proving that domestic violence can be confronted and defeated with the right tools and community. JoJo's message is clear: Domestic violence will not end itself. But together, we can be the wings that lift survivors to freedom.